One Day

Last summer I wanted to take pics throughout the day so I could remember what a regular day was like at this time of our lives. I was proud that I remembered most of the day since I'm a forgetful person, although I did miss a few hours in the evening. I completely forgot all about it until last week and now that Jake and Abby go to bed about 2 hours before I do, it's a good time to post! 

So, here's a day:

I usually wake up when Abby wakes up and Jake is already gone. 
And if she has to yell in order to wake me up, she's kinda mad.

but then she cheers up!

during the summer we'd always have to go check out the back yard because 
Abby could hear the construction going on from a house being built

morning faces of course

Morning bottle. 

Abby always strokes her hair while she drinks.

This is part of the day I don't love because I'm trying to get out of the house. I think Abby can feel my anxious-ness and gets sad – it's amazing how my mood affects her so obviously. All she wants is to play outside and I won't let her.

She wore a neckerchief because she was very drooly.

Seriously, why does it always take so long to get out of the house?!?!

Finally at the babysitters

Michelle and her daughter Alaina. These are the people 
who Abby hangs out with most next to Jake and I

Time to work! Poptarts, milk, tampons. The necessities.

This particular day I took photos of some apartments near campus 

to make vectors out of them to use  in a publication about housing

I also took a pic of my co-worker Trent for the same page. 
He became an old father sad that his kids were headed off to college.

Jeremy is the video dude in the office, he also owns a powder surf company... 
we get into a lot of discussions... I think that's why I snapped a pic.

My messy office.

KFC for lunch. Yes, I eat garbage food most days.

And, back with the nugget!!

She's usually happy when I pick her up, and mad at the end of the 2 blocks drive home.

More faces while we enjoy KFC

After lunch, Abby takes a nap and I keep working. Until...

Daddy's home!!

Kisses from Daddy...

Sloppy kisses from Abby...

Jake tries to take a little nap when he get's home. 
But Abby's a little too cute for that. And mischievous.

The most awkward pic of the day. Dinner from Panda Express. Yes, I'm a little ashamed both lunch and dinner came from restaurants. It's not necessarily 100% accurate of our everyday. But, at this point in our lives, We're both a little too busy and apathetic to make all our food. We're usually working on something and suddenly realize we're starving. Which is another habit I hope will change someday, but for now, it's fast food, mac n cheese, and cottage cheese and pears.

We watch almost all the Salt Lake Real games and U.S. soccer games in the summer.

The evening is when I failed to take photos. But we went out and picked raspberries and played outside until it was cold, then ate raspberries, and went to bed. In the summer we usually didn't get abby in bed until around 10. 

So, there's the day! I think I mostly wanted to do this since I know life will change in a few years. I hope to get better at planning activities with Abby and any other kids that come along. And I'd like to get to know my neighbors better and be involved in the community. I want to get better at cooking and plan meals and go grocery shopping once a week instead of the frantic need-to-get-milk-so-I'll-grab-random-stuff-on-the-aisle-ends type of shopping I do now. I want to get good enough at it that I have at least 20 recipes memorized. I want to read more and work less and play outside more.

I really love my job. I want to have more kids and not work full time someday. But sometimes I worry I won't feel the accomplishment that comes from designing everyday and seeing a publication through from start to finish. That everyday will feel the same and be hectic and exhausting and frustrating and I'll end up miss work terribly. I wouldn't know these worries existed if I didn't hear other women talk about what they struggle with. I'm realizing I have a LOT to learn about being a homemaker and there's been times I've sort of resented the expectation to be a homemaker. I didn't want to do it simply because it was expected. I'm not naturally very maternal or organized, both skills highly needed in the motherhood occupation, which made me repel the idea of being a homemaker even more. Plus, sometimes I run into ladies who are really into it who are really weird to me. They care about and get excited over weird things. I don't want to care about stains and whole wheat and going to the gym. And buying triangle-pattern baby leggings from that lady on instagram. When I try making a list of items I should get from the case-lot sale and cooking bags of freezer meals and getting 10 years of food storage I want to commit a crime after. I've been dreading visiting teaching because my partner and ladies we visit talk about things I can't relate to. I mostly ask questions and nod but in my mind, panic and boredom somehow both start spreading.

But, I know what is really happening is I'm just worried about the future because it's unknown, not because it's really that terrifying. And as always, it'll be about finding the balance. The balance between doing things I'm interested in and excited about AND things I have to do AND learning new things that can make my family better off.

That Facebook quiz told me my mental age is 17. Well, fine.